Is it OK to gift lilies? A friendly guide to the meaning and etiquette of gifting this complex flower
Lilies hold a special place in many cultures. Their beauty, fragrance, and intricate symbolism have made them a staple floral gift for ages. However, there are some nuances to be aware of when it comes to the appropriateness of gifting lilies. As your friendly neighborhood florist, I’ve put together this guide to walk you through the meaning, history, proper usage and care for lilies as a gift. Let’s dive in!
The layered history and significance of lilies
With their elegant trumpet-shaped blooms and sweet scent, it’s no wonder lilies have captured our imagination for centuries. Various cultures have imbued the lily with unique symbolic meaning over the years:
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Purity and innocence – Lilies are strongly tied to purity in Greek and Roman mythology, Christianity, and Victorian flower poetry. Their bright white color evokes innocence and virtue.
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Fertility and motherhood – Many pagan cultures honored the lily as a symbol of fertility and rebirth. Its ties to femininity and motherhood still remain in modern flower language.
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Death and remembrance – One of the most well-known associations is the lily’s link to death. They were found sprinkled in ancient tombs and are still commonly used for funerals today to represent the soul’s revival.
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Spirituality – Across Buddhism, feng shui, and iconography in Renaissance art, the lily symbolizes spiritual awakening, enlightenment, and the soul’s connection to the divine.
As you can see, the lily has accumulated quite a range of meanings! So gifting it requires some thoughtfulness to ensure you honor the recipient and occasion appropriately. Next let’s look at some helpful guidelines.
Best practices for gifting lilies
Lilies may be the perfect gift, or the absolute wrong one, depending on the situation. Here are some tips to make sure your lily gifting goes smoothly:
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Avoid gifting to those in mourning – In many cultures, especially in Asia, white flowers represent death. Lilies could come across as insensitive. Go with a safer option when expressing condolences.
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Check for cat owners – This is crucial! Lilies are extremely toxic to cats. Even small exposure can be fatal. Always opt for a different flower when gifting cat owners.
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Match the color to the occasion – Each lily hue carries unique meaning that can complement your message. Refer to the guide below:
Meaning of lily colors
| Color | Meaning | Appropriate Occasions |
|---|---|---|
| White | Purity, sympathy, rebirth | Weddings, milestone events |
| Pink | Femininity, admiration | Birthdays, Valentine‘s Day |
| Yellow | Gratitude, celebration | Graduations, anniversaries |
| Orange | Confidence, pride | Promotions, achievements |
| Red | Passion, desire | Valentine‘s Day, romance |
| Purple | Spirituality, royalty | Cultural events, religious celebrations |
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Include other flowers – For celebratory gifts like birthdays or Valentine’s Day, blend lilies with more lively flowers like tulips, roses, or carnations to brighten the mood.
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Care for them properly – Follow these tips to extend the life of your gifted lilies:
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Trim stems and remove lower leaves before arranging in a vase.
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Change water and recut stems every 2-3 days.
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Remove pollen to prevent staining and encourage longer blooms.
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Keep in a cool spot out of direct sunlight.
Regional etiquette on gifting lilies
The cultural significance of lilies also leads to some important regional gifting etiquette to keep in mind:
Asia – Avoid pure white lilies, as they convey death. Opt for pinks or reds instead for celebratory gifting.
Europe – Lilies are perfectly suitable for condolences or festive occasions. White is the top choice.
North America – White stargazers are the most popular funeral flower. Otherwise, all colors are gifted freely.
Australia – Native lilies like the New Zealand Christmas lily are gifted for most occasions. Avoid tiger lilies as they carry a negative meaning.
When in doubt, you really can’t go wrong with asking the recipient if they have a favorite color or type of flower! This shows extra care and consideration.
History and meaning based on lily variety
Beyond general color meaning, some specific types of lilies carry additional symbolism rooted in their unique history:
Calla lilies – These trumpet-shaped blooms were honored by ancient Greeks, Romans, and Egyptians as the symbol of feminine beauty. Today they represent magnificence and radiance.
Lotus lilies – Revered across Buddhist and Hindu faiths, the lotus represents purity, enlightenment, self-regeneration and divine birth. They are considered sacred flowers.
Water lilies – These aquatic lilies famously inspired some of Claude Monet’s most celebrated impressionist paintings of nature. They convey a sense of tranquility and introspection.
Stargazer lilies – The most popular funeral lily due to its strong fragrance and assisting the soul’s ascent to heaven, according to Victorian flower language.
Tiger lilies – Named for their brushstroke orange patterns, they symbolize confidence, pride and wealth. But in some cultures, like Australia, they represent vengeance and hatred.
Easter lilies – With their trumpet-shaped white blooms, they’ve come to represent the spiritual purity and rebirth associated with Jesus’s resurrection in Christian tradition.
Insights on lilies from historical figures
Some of history and literature’s greatest minds have waxed poetic on the profound charms of the lily. Understanding what made this flower so captivating to them can deepen our appreciation of the lily’s allure:
“Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not clothed like one of these.” – Jesus (Matthew 6:28), comparing lilies to divine beauty
“The lily has always had an honorable place in medicine… as a sign of high morality.” – Pedanius Dioscorides, ancient Greek physician linking lilies to virtue
“As the lily among thorns, so is my love among the daughters.” – King Solomon, alluding to lilies representing rarity and singularity (Song of Solomon 2:2)
“Love is like a lily among thorns.” – St. Thomas Aquinas, echoing Solomon’s sentiment of lilies symbolizing virtuous love
“He‘s mad that trusts in the tameness of a wolf, a horse‘s health, a boy‘s love, or a whore‘s oath.” – William Shakespeare, referencing how lilies represent false or transient beauty (King Lear Act 3, Scene 6)
Gaining cultural context around how influential thinkers understood the essence of the lily provides enlightening food for thought on the flower‘s complexities.
Botanical facts – biology and care tips for gifting lilies
On the scientific side, here are some botanical facts and care tips to help gifted lilies thrive:
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Native habitat – Most lilies hail from temperate northern hemisphere regions like Asia, Europe and North America. This explains their global popularity.
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Optimal conditions – Lilies flourish in moist, well-draining soil and partly sunny spots. Indoor arrangements should be kept in a cool location out of direct sunlight.
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Water – Change vase water every 2-3 days and recut stems to promote water intake. Leafless stems absorb better.
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Lifespan – Some smaller lily varieties may only last 1-2 weeks, while larger blooms like the iconic Asiatic hybrids can bloom up to 4 weeks if cared for properly.
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Toxicity – All parts of a lily are extremely toxic to cats. Lilies should be kept far out of reach of cats to avoid accidental poisoning. Dogs and humans generally experience low toxicity if ingested.
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Pollen – Wiping pollen away can extend the bloom time and prevent guests‘ fingers from being stained when picking up or arranging displayed lilies.
I hope exploring some of the rich history, cultural significance, proper usage and biology behind lilies provides helpful insights on gifting this special flower appropriately and respectfully. Lilies have inspired awe across civilizations with their stunning beauty and intoxicating fragrance unlike any other flower. By understanding what this bloom has meant to humanity, we can ensure we uphold its cherished legacy when gifting it. If you have any other lily questions, don’t hesitate to ask!