Let‘s Talk Kissing: To Slobber or Not to Slobber?

Hey friend! Pucker up, because we‘re going to smooch our way through the wet vs dry kissing debate and unlock the secrets of the perfect kiss.

Kissing feels heavenly, but too much moisture can ruin the moment. Where‘s the line between passionate and gross? Does the wetness level reveal hidden desires? Are men and women‘s preferences different?

Grab some lip balm and let‘s take a juicy dive into the science, history and art of kissing to solve this slippery dilemma once and for all!

To Tongue or Not To Tongue

Not all kisses are created equal. From quick closed-mouth pecks to intense open-mouthed French kissing, we have a whole mouthwatering menu of options:

Closed-Mouth Kisses

• Cheek Kiss – friendly affection
• Eskimo Kiss – adorable nose rub
• Air Kiss – formal courtesy
• Hand Kiss – chivalrous flattery

Open-Mouthed Kisses

• French Kiss – passionate, exciting
• Butterfly Kiss – fluttering eyelash pecks
• Lizard Kiss – tongue rapidly moves in/out
• Spiderman Kiss – upside down lip-lock

But once tongues enter the picture, things get wetter fast. Are sloppy open-mouthed kisses hot, or just a slippery mess?

The Wetter The Better? Depends Who You Ask

Here‘s where men and women diverge. Studies show males seek 60% wetter kisses than females, with more tongue action too. Why the gap?

Evolutionary psychologists theorize men associate wetter kisses with increased fertility and sexual readiness. More spit could signal she‘s ovulating and ready to reproduce. Makes sense from a primal perspective!

Women prefer wet kissing primarily with committed romantic partners, rather than casual flings. The intimacy and passion can solidify bonding. Lesser moisture may signal he‘s not that into you.

But cultural norms factor in too. In Europe, wet, tongue-filled kisses are no big deal. In Japan, any open-mouth kissing is considered vulgar, says anthropologist Helen Fisher.

The bottom line: preferences vary. Communication is key to getting the wet-dry ratio right.

To Drool Or Not To Drool?

Okay, but we‘re not talking slip-n-slides here. Where‘s the line between titillating wetness and Need-a-mop sloppy?

Slobbery Indicators:

• Face/chin left dripping in spit
• Audible sucking sounds
• Lipstick smeared across cheeks
• Having to stop to wipe faces off

Yikes! Reel it in. Experts suggest the kiss should feel juicy but not so soaked that excess spit dribbles down your partner‘s face requiring cleanup. Eww.

Subtlety is key. Start slower with gentler lip-locking. Gradually intensify tongue contact as passion escalates while assessing comfort levels. Pull back and change pace if your partner seems overwhelmed by wetness.

Kissing By The Numbers

Curious how your kissing habits stack up? Surveys offer juicy insights into the wet vs dry debate:

• 33% of women prefer light tongue action during kissing vs 70% of men enjoying heavy tongue.

• Only 28% of women rated excessive wetness as a turn-on compared to 61% of males.

• Over 75% of both sexes said bad breath was a major kissing turn-off. Minty freshness makes wet kisses more palatable.

• Nearly 60% of women versus just 15% of males said a bad or overly aggressive kisser could nix a second date. Men have lower standards!

So ladies seem pickier about kissing excellence. Guys are more willing to overlook sloppiness for a chance of sex. Chalk it up to hormones.

Kissing Through The Ages

Practices for smooching have shifted over the centuries:

• Ancient Egypt – Kissing was practiced only among social equals, not allowed for commoners.

• Ancient Greece – Alexander the Great greeted male friends with a kiss on the mouth. Totally casual bro behavior.

• Roman Empire – Kissing became more prominent, extended beyond elites. Mark of friendship.

• European Middle Ages – Blowing kisses and hand-kissing emerged as courtly, polite greetings.

• 1500-1600s – Open mouth kissing was introduced to Europe. Considered ugly and unrefined by many.

• Late 1600s – Passionate, tongue-inclusive French kissing becomes popular, no longer just for affairs.

• Early 1900s – Movie kissing scenes scandalize audiences with 20-30 second lip-locks. Previously just quick pecks were shown.

So cultural tolerance for wetter, sloppier kissing emerged slowly over time. And movie kisses kept intensifying, with more passion, tounges and spit swapping on screen.

Eventually the famous beach kiss in From Here to Eternity (1953) between Burt Lancaster and Deborah Kerr "broke the taboo on erotic kissing in American cinema." French kissing was finally mainstream!

You Had Me At Hello: Famous Kisses

Cinema and TV are filled with iconic kisses across the wetness spectrum. These scenes demonstrate the dramatic difference kissing styles can make:

Dry-Lipped Kisses

• Spiderman upside down in the rain
• Lady and the Tramp‘s spaghetti smooch
• Big chase scene kiss in Chasing Liberty

Wet & Wild Kisses

• From Here to Eternity ocean wave embrace
• Tobey Maguire & Kirsten Dunst‘s upside down Spiderman smooch
• The Noteboook‘s sensual kiss in the rain

Even G-rated kisses go hot and heavy! Snow White‘s prince revives her with an open-mouthed life-giving lip lock. Steam pours out teakettles and fireworks literally explode! Disney doesn‘t play with wet kisses.

Kissing As Communication

Kissing isn‘t just physical. It communicates emotionally at multiple levels:

Physically

• Hormones like dopamine and oxytocin surge, enhancing bonding

Visually

• Gestures signify affection and signal intent

Energetically

• We read subtle cues from our partner through empathy

So kisses reveal deeper meanings beyond just pleasure. Through experience we learn to decode and reciprocate our partner‘s unspoken messages and desires.

But miscommunications happen too! One person‘s bliss might be another‘s disgust if preferences don‘t align. Partners need to navigate these differences.

Navigating The Wet vs Dry Divide

Suppose your dream date leans in for a kiss, and they slobber all over you like an excited Saint Bernard. Yuck!

But don‘t just grimace and bear it. Kindly offer guidance to improve the experience for both:

• Use humor to defuse tension: "Whoa, so much drool!" Share a laugh.
• Frame feedback positively – what you‘d like more of: "I really enjoy gentler lip kissing actually"
• Suggest a different activity to redirect energy like dancing or taking a walk.
• Ultimately, you may just need to say this type of kissing isn‘t for you if mismatches persist. And that‘s okay.

We all deserve pleasure. By communicating openly, we can discover our complementary middle ground.

Pucker Up!

The kissing debate need not be a tug-of-war between soup and sandpaper. With understanding and compromise, we can determine the exact wet-dry ratio that clicks.

Focus less on particular techniques and more on listening to your partner‘s desires and expanding your sensual vocabulary together.

Move with the flow. Savor each moment. Let kissing nourish your soul.

Now pucker up and go enjoy the magic! Just maybe keep a towel handy.