Should I Kiss My Horse?

As an experienced equestrian and horse owner for over 20 years, I‘ve had the joy of bonding with these magnificent creatures. But as a fellow horse enthusiast, you know they communicate differently than humans. Well-meaning affection shown in the wrong way can confuse horses and even lead to dangerous misunderstandings.

So should you kiss a horse? Let me provide some insights on safer ways for you and your horse to interact, understand each other better, and build an unbreakable bond of trust.

Why Kissing Can Be Risky

We kiss on the lips to share human affection, but horses don‘t actually kiss each other at all! In fact, putting your face so close to a horse‘s mouth could spell trouble.

Those large teeth are made for grazing grass and crushing carrots, not gentle human smooching. To a horse, having a face close to their mouth signals an invitation to playfully "spar" by mouthing behaviors like nibbling lips or gently biting – definitely not what you want!

According to the ASPCA, lip kissing and hugging are the riskiest ways for humans to show horses affection. From 2007 to 2021, an average of 68 people per year suffered horse-related facial injuries. Over 70% of those were due to biting.

So pucker up for pony kisses at your own risk! Instead, keep those sweet kisses away from your horse‘s mouth and aim for safer spots like their forehead, cheeks, chin, or just the nostrils. Their lips and teeth should be avoided.

How Horses Show Love

Now, just because horses don‘t kiss doesn‘t mean they don‘t feel affection! Here‘s how our equine friends express fondness:

Nuzzling – Bringing their nose or lips to your body in a nudging or rubbing motion

Licking – Using their scratchy tongues to lick your hand, arm, shoulder, etc.

Chewing – Gently grasping your fingers, sleeve, pocket or other parts of your clothing with their lips

Grooming – Using their teeth to nibble away hair, dirt, and parasites on you

Breathing – Blowing soft, warm breaths on your hands, neck, or chest

Relaxed lips & head – Having loose, droopy lips and resting their head on you

Approaching – Coming over to you first in a field or stall in greeting

Following – Willingness to walk alongside you and follow your lead

Nickering – Issuing sweet, low-pitched whinnies upon seeing you

According to equine behavior research, these are all signs your horse genuinely enjoys your company and feels a close bond with you. Who needs kisses when you get nibbles and nuzzles instead?

Relationship-Building Activities

Sure, the occasional apple or carrot can help reinforce positive behavior during training. But don‘t let treats become the main representation of love between you and your horse. They may come to expect constant snacks rather than valuing true companionship.

For deeper bonding, spend quality time together through:

• Grooming – Thoroughly brushing their coat, expressing care through touch

• Hand-grazing – Leading them to fresh pasture grass for stress-free munching

• Ground work – Walking through training exercises on the ground, focused together

• Trail rides – Exploring new places and enjoying nature as a team

• Relaxing – Simply resting together, offering gentle reassurance

Talk to your horse during these moments using a calm, soothing voice. The emotional tones will resonate with them even if they don‘t comprehend the vocabulary. Make it all about spending meaningful time together, not just doling out treats.

Compassionate Training

Does your training style align with your horse‘s needs? Consider implementing more positive reinforcement techniques focused on consistency, patience, and compassion.

Punishments like yelling, yanking, whipping, or forcing into uncomfortable situations will only break trust. But reward-based training helps a horse associate you with safety and comfort while building their confidence.

Less Effective Methods	More Effective Methods
Yelling, anger	Calm guidance
Harsh corrections	Gradual shaping
Flooding with fear triggers	Desensitizing gently
Pain-based tools	Voice commands, release cues
Forcing into positions	Molding gently

Research shows horses trained with positive reinforcement display greater attentiveness, less stress, and more cooperative behaviors with their human handlers.

Take things slowly, set your horse up for success in baby steps, reward them frequently with praise and release of pressure, and you‘ll be amazed by the new levels of mutual understanding you reach together!

Importance of "Speaking Horse"

To truly connect with horses, we have to understand how they naturally communicate and interpret the world around them.

Horses rely on body language and non-verbal signals to express themselves. Are you catching what your horse is putting down? Here are some telling indicators to watch for:

• Relaxed – Loosely hanging lip, softly cocked leg, dozing
• Interested – Forward perked ears, extended neck, sniffing
• Irritated – Pinning ears back, tail swishing, head tossing
• Warning – Raising or stomping front foot, baring teeth
• Fearful – Widened nostrils, rapid breathing, white of eyes showing
• Playful – Startling nips, light bucking, lowered head

These are just a few examples of the many cues horses use to convey their moods and reactions. Understanding "horse language" prevents accidents and helps you respond appropriately to strengthen your bond.

For example, if your horse pins his ears walking past the riding arena, he may be anticipating a stressful training session instead of quality time with you. Changing up your plans according to his communication makes a difference.

Know Your Individual Horse

While every horse shares similarities, they each have quirks and preferences that make them unique. Take the time to discover what sets your special horse apart.

Consider their:

• Level of extroversion – Is your horse outgoing or more introverted?

• Confidence – Do they seem secure or fearful?

• Energy level – Are they laid-back or raring to go all the time?

• Interests – What activities do they engage in versus avoid?

• Treat motivations – What goodies make their eyes light up?

• Grooming preferences – Firm brush strokes or gentle?

• Handling tolerance – How much touching do they welcome?

• Herd dynamics – Leader, middle, or low in the pecking order?

Getting to know these individual traits helps you interact with your horse in ways they‘ll best respond to. Maybe lively games appeal to them more than cuddling. Or a lower-energy introvert would prefer solo exploring to big trail group rides.

Every horse is unique, so make your bond intimately special.

Addressing Unhappiness

Horses thrive on consistency and predictability. So if you notice your normally even-tempered horse acting troubled, pay attention! Unresolved discomfort can erode the foundations of your relationship.

Signs your horse may be distressed or unhappy include:

• Increased aggressiveness like biting, kicking out

• Reluctance to be caught, haltered, or handled

• Lack of appetite or motivation

• Blank stare or dull coat

• Little interest in their surroundings

These changes in normal behavior can potentially indicate an underlying physical issue like ulcers, soreness, or illness. Or your horse may be suffering from stress or anxiety.

As their caretaker and companion, you know your horse‘s regular habits best. Don‘t ignore your gut instinct if it says something seems "off" with your equine partner.

Consult an equine veterinarian right away to get them thoroughly examined or have their living situation evaluated by a specialist. With proper diagnosis and care, you can get your happy horse back to normal again!

Let‘s Sum It Up

Horses offer humans a profound connection – but only if we truly make the effort to understand them. Show your horse love through mutual respect, compassionate care, and non-verbal bonding rather than blindly projecting human customs like kissing onto them.

By recognizing how horses express affection, spending meaningful time together, "speaking their language", and catering to their individuality, that‘s how your relationship will blossom for years to come.

I hope these tips help you and your remarkable horse understand each other better and keep your partnership both enriching AND safe. Let me know if you have any other equine behavior questions! I‘m always happy to help fellow horse lovers.