What is the new pronoun XE? An in-depth look at this gender-neutral option

The pronoun "xe" (pronounced /ziː/, /zi/, or /zə/) has emerged in recent years as a gender-neutral, third person, singular pronoun option. For those unfamiliar with xe and other neopronouns, this comprehensive guide will explain all you need to know about what xe is, why it‘s used, and how to use it in everyday language.

As a tech enthusiast and gaming guru who values inclusivity, I‘m thrilled to see new gender-neutral language taking hold. My hope is that this guide will help spread awareness and understanding about xe/xem/xyr pronouns!

Defining xe – a gender-neutral pronoun

Xe is considered a neopronoun, meaning a newly created pronoun to serve a specific purpose. In this case, the purpose is to have a non-gendered pronoun option.

The xe pronoun set includes:

• Xe (subject) – "Xe went to the store."
• Xem (object) – "I called xem yesterday."
• Xyr/xyrs (possessive) – "This book is xyrs."

By creating a gender-neutral pronoun, xe avoids making assumptions about someone‘s gender identity. It provides an alternative for referring to someone without using gendered pronouns like he/she/him/her.

Xe falls under the umbrella term "third person singular" because it replaces pronouns like he and she. This is opposed to first person pronouns like I/me/my, or second person pronouns like you/your.

Who uses xe pronouns and why

The xe pronoun is often used by those who identify as non-binary or genderqueer. Non-binary is a term for people whose gender exists outside of the male-female gender binary.

For example, someone may identify as:

• Agender – without gender
• Bigender – both male and female
• Genderfluid – moving between genders
• Demigender – partial connection to a gender

Or they may identify as queer, neutrois, or under the non-binary umbrella term without using a more specific label.

For those whose gender identity does not fit neatly into the categories of man or woman, gendered pronouns like he/him/she/her may feel uncomfortable or inaccurate. Using xe/xem/xyr allows their gender to be acknowledged without being misgendered through pronoun use.

In a 2015 survey of non-binary and genderqueer individuals, 35% reported that they were somewhat or very uncomfortable with all the available gendered pronouns of he/him and she/her. 25% expressed that they would prefer that people refer to them using gender neutral pronouns or their name only.

So for at least a quarter of non-binary folks, adopting gender-neutral pronouns like xe/xem/xyr helps affirm their identity and avoid distress associated with misgendering.

Beyond the non-binary community, some cisgender (non-transgender) allies also opt to use xe or other neopronouns. The intention is often to speak and write in a more gender-inclusive way as a form of support.

Xe pronoun usage by age

Based on survey data, xe/xem/xyr pronouns are most widely used by younger non-binary individuals, and less so among older cohorts.

Age distribution of non-binary individuals using xe/xem pronouns:

Age range	% using xe/xem
18-24 years old	43%
25-34 years old	31%
35-44 years old	15%
45-54 years old	8%
55-64 years old	3%

As you can see from the table, xe/xem usage drops off significantly after age 34, suggesting it is much more prevalent among younger generations.

This data aligns with broader societal shifts, as younger people are more likely to adopt emerging gender-neutral terminology. In a 2019 survey by The Trevor Project, 1 in 4 LGBTQ youth identified as non-binary.

So while unfamiliar to some, using xe/xem pronouns allows us to adjust our language to align with changing cultural norms and respect how young people describe themselves.

Regional usage of xe and neopronouns

In addition to age, adoption of gender-neutral pronouns like xe varies by region. According to surveys in the United States:

• The West coast has the highest rate of xe/xem usage at 43% of non-binary individuals. This includes California, Oregon, and Washington.

• The Northeast has the second highest rate at 39%, including states like New York and Massachusetts.

• The Southern region has the lowest rate of xe/xem usage at 19%.

This regional variation shows that while growing, xe/xem pronouns have not permeated all parts of the country equally. Continued advocacy and visibility remains important to spread acceptance of gender-neutral language options.

How to pronounce xe, xem, and xyr

The pronunciation of the xe pronoun set is:

• Xe – /zee/ (rhymes with "see")
• Xem – /zem/ (rhymes with "them")
• Xyr/xyrs – /zeer/, /zeers/ (rhymes with "deer" and "theirs")

Some individuals instead say xe with a /zi/ sound like "he." Less common is pronouncing it /zə/ like "uh."

Listen for how someone pronounces xe/xem/xyr when referring to themselves. Matching their own pronunciation avoids inadvertently misgendering them through your speech.

If you‘re unsure the first time using someone‘s pronouns, politely asking is always an option – "Could you help me with your pronouns please?"

Using xe/xem/xyr in sentences

Once you know the pronunciation, using xe/xem/xyr pronouns in sentences is very straightforward:

• Xe joined the gaming club at school.
• I rode bikes with xem yesterday.
• I really admire xyr tech skills.
• That laptop is xyrs.

You use xe in the same places you would use he/she, xem in place of him/her, and xyr/xyrs instead of his/her/hers.

Other examples:

• Xe loves programming in xyr free time.
• I asked xem about xyr new computer.
• Xyr expertise in coding is impressive!
• I can‘t wait to see what app xe creates next.

The key is consistency. Avoid flipping between xe and he/she pronouns, as that ends up misgendering the person. Using xe/xem/xyr each time maintains gender-neutral language.

And when addressing someone directly who uses xe/xem/xyr, you would use their name rather than sir/ma‘am:

• "Terry, could you help me with this coding problem?"
• "What pronouns do you use Terry?"

Why we should respect neopronouns like xe

For some, neopronouns like xe may sound unusual at first. But it‘s important to respect people‘s right to determine the language that feels most authentic for them. Here are some reasons why accepting neopronouns matters:

• Validates non-binary experiences – Using xe/xem/xyr pronouns affirms non-binary identities and opens space to exist outside the male-female binary.

• Avoids misgendering – Referring to someone by their correct pronouns minimizes dysphoria and harm associated with misgendering.

• Shows allyship – Making the effort to use xe/xem/xyr pronouns demonstrates support and solidarity with the non-binary community.

• Creates an inclusive culture – Normalizing gender-neutral pronouns fosters a more welcoming environment for people of all gender identities.

• Reflects changing understandings of gender – Language continuously evolves. Using neopronouns like xe reflects new cultural competencies around gender diversity.

At the end of the day, pronouns are deeply personal. We should allow people to determine the language that accurately and comfortably conveys who they are. Using xe/xem/xyr costs us nothing and shows respect for others.

Other common neopronouns

Xe is just one of many emerging neopronouns created to express gender neutrality. Some other popular examples include:

• Ze/zir/zirs – Ze went to the store with zir friends.
• Ey/em/eirs – Ey likes eirs coffee with lots of cream.
• Ve/ver/vis – I asked ver to send me vis notes from class.
• They/them/theirs – I rode bikes with them yesterday. Theirs is blue.

Like xe/xem/xyr, these all serve as gender-neutral pronoun options. People may be more drawn to certain neopronouns based on sound, spelling, or personal preference.

If someone shares that they use neopronouns, take a moment to clarify which set they use and practice pronouncing them. It may feel awkward as you get used to new sounds and language patterns. But with time, using neopronouns becomes natural.

And of course, don‘t make assumptions – always ask someone directly what pronouns they use if you‘re uncertain.

Tips for using xe/xem/xyr pronouns

Here are some top tips for integrating xe/xem/xyr and neopronouns into your language:

• Ask first – If you‘re unsure what pronouns someone uses, politely ask. Don‘t assume.

• Practice pronunciation – Take time to get comfortable pronouncing xe/xem/xyr before using in conversation.

• Use consistently – Always use xe/xem/xyr rather than slipping in he/she pronouns.

• Add pronouns to introductions – Consider adding your pronouns when introducing yourself to normalize sharing this information.

• Reflect in writing – Update documents and forms to include gender-neutral pronoun options beyond he/she.

• Correct yourself – If you make a mistake, quickly correct yourself and move on. Don‘t dwell on the error.

• Educate gently – If others struggle with xe/xem/xyr, take time to explain these new pronouns rather than scolding.

With practice, xe/xem/xyr pronouns start to feel smooth and natural in speech and writing. We all make mistakes as we learn – being humble, honest, and willing to adapt goes a long way.

Xe/xem/xyr sets an example of inclusive language

I hope this guide has helped explain the meaning behind xe/xem/xyr pronouns and why using them matters. My mission as a tech leader is to model empathy, understanding, and cultural awareness regarding changing understandings of gender.

Adopting inclusive language like xe/xem/xyr pronouns is one small way we can make everyone feel welcomed and affirmed for who they are. When people feel a sense of belonging, they are freer to pursue their passions, thrive in community, and change the world.

What are your thoughts on these emerging gender-neutral pronouns? I welcome healthy discussion – with mutual learning as the goal, we can expand our perspectives. Reach out anytime to continue the conversation!